I’m not gonna lie. I read Twilight. I enjoyed most of Twilight. But I am not obsessed with Twilight. In fact, I find the craze of vampires rather funny. Besides, if not for Stephenie Meyers, Forks Wa. would have remained a desolate little town with no visitors. (sorry Forks, but it’s true. I’ve been there). Here’s a speech my little brother gave this year on the repercussions of Twilight mania. I found it rather entertaining.
Twilight- by Nate Johnson
In the fall of 2005 a book was published by Little, Brown and Company that would change the world forever. Some say this book changed their lives; that it has molded there being, some say they don’t know how they lived without it for so long, that reading this book was like breathing for the first time, meaning was given to their lives. In the past 5 years, millions of copies have been sold in over 35 languages and the numbers continue to increase, along with its followers. The influence of this book has spread throughout the world and shaped a generation. For all of these reasons I believe that Stephenie Meyer’s “Twilight” series has become a danger to our society and to the world.
Now as someone who has read the series I can honestly say that what Meyer’s did was a crime. These books were written for one audience and one audience only, adolescent girls. Every word in those things are so dumbed down and poorly written that it makes Calvin and Hobbes look like Shakespeare. And I’m sure when Meyer’s wrote Twilight she didn’t have the intention of destroying the minds and lives of so many innocent young women. But I’m also pretty sure Tiger Woods didn’t mean to disappoint his millions of fans around the world when he was off cheating on his wife with 16 other women, but he did. Twilight has created a blindfold over the eyes of young women everywhere; from the moment they pick up “Twilight” Edward Cullen is eternally the only man for them.
As I searched around the internet for horror stories of how “Twilight” ruins lives I found many blogs and articles written by men, more often than not men who were either in a serious relationship or whom are married. In these articles, I found some very distressing stories, for about an hour or so I meandered through pages of men complaining about the effect these books have had on their wife or girlfriend. At markhodgkinson.blogspot.com, I came across an article about a man, Mark, who was originally intrigued by the sound of “Twilight”; this was before the series became a phenomenon. He purchased the first 3 book s and began to read. Here Mark explains his reaction to the book: “I remember there was this one part that described in sickening detail through the girl protagonist’s point of view how this vampire’s skin was glistening and how hot each individual body part of his was. It was so gross; it made me want to puke. I almost put the book down right there and never read on, yet I did. Why? I guess I still had hope.” Mark’s hope would soon fail him, and his day time reader, would soon become his nightmare. Soon after he finished the second book, he noticed his wife was reading “Twilight” the first book of the series; this is where his problems arose. Soon after she began reading, his wife began to banter him about why he couldn’t be more like Edward, why he couldn’t be more sensitive like Edward, or more romantic, or more of anything like Edward. This is the common denominator among men who hate Twilight, there girlfriends are in love with the fictitious Edward Cullen.
After I finished the article, I read through the comments posted on Mark’s blog, what I found saddened me. Here is a quote from an anonymous reader of Mark’s Blog: “I can’t believe what I’m reading. My girlfriend of 7 yrs has just finished with me 2 months ago after reading this book. She never gave me a reason for leaving. But I know she’s obsessed over twilight, after watching the film 5 times in 2 days. She read all 4 books in about 2 weeks. I’ve only just realized what has happened. She has told me to read the books, even though I don’t read books. I’m gonna have to, I think, to realize what’s going on, but these books have ruined my life. We were happy together, and we bought a house together 4 months ago. We planned a good life together, but now, it ain’t gonna happen because of these books. Well thanks to the author for ruining my life, and by the sounds of it a few other lives.” This was just one of many quotes by men who had been left because of an imaginary relationship their girlfriends had created in their minds with one, Edward Cullen.
What might be even worse than the fact that these young women are falling in love with Edward Cullen, is that fact that they are falling in love with a total creeper. In the books Edward plays cat and mouse with Bella’s heart, insisting that he loves her to much to kill her, but not enough to stick around, that may be why New Moon was my favorite of the series; a lack of Edward Cullen can really spice things up. Edward also insists on following Bella everywhere she goes, whether she’s out with friends or hanging out with her Dad, or when she’s asleep at home, in her room, by herself, sleeping, Edward is always there watching. Why so many girls are fascinated by this stalker, I don’t know, but it must mean something.
Ever since “Twilight” went soaring to the top of every best seller list, I’ve heard stories of from men tearing Twilight apart like it was personal. I never really understood, I mean I disliked the book as much as the next guy, but honestly I didn’t realize it was causing so much pain. I can understand why men who were left for a fictional vampire might be upset. It’s degrading, and somewhat of a low blow to men, for a woman to believe that a man should be as perfect as a cold, awkward, sparkling vampire. It’s a problem that has swept the nation and is slowly creeping out around the world. This thought scares me, that a fictional character could affect the minds of people so greatly, actually what scares me more is the fact that I read a bumper sticker at my high school last year that read, “Saving Myself for Edward Cullen.” I hope that was a joke, but who knows, it’s a strange world we’re living in. A world where fake vampires are controlling the minds of young women, I mean come on they don’t even have to put them under a trance anymore, they just make them sit down and read a book by the fire. These new-wave vampires have really figured it out. So I hope that next time you see twilight, you take a second to step back and realize the trouble that can come from reading a book to seriously, enjoy it for what it’s worth but don’t obsess over it, and don’t fall in love with a Vampire.
Now, my Dad was a seasoned veteran when it came to sporting events. He had this contraption that he used to reel in any home run ball that was hit between the wall to the field and our seats (There was a big gap between the two at the Kingdome, so any homerun that was hit there was left for the maintenance crew to grab later). But my Dad refused to let a homerun ball be left down there. So he cut out the bottom of a bucket, tied a bunch of bungee cords to the bottom and tied a rope to the top so he could lower the bucket down ontop of the ball. The bungees would all the ball to get into the bucket but were strong enough to hold the ball when we reeled it in.
